Beer Intervals

Here's a lil something I came across on cyclingnews. It's an advice column of sorts where "Grandpa Kim" asked about keeping up with youngsters and all their drinking ways. I must confess that since moving here I've become a ridiculous lightweight, so I feel the following is fantastic advice. Next time some of you see me I'll be taking the trophy and putting you under the table.

"Irreverent Grandpa Kim,

Well, I do say you pose a question not often addressed on CyclingNews.com. Beer intervals or maybe beerervals. Finally I get to put my MD to good use.

Since I already know you, I will assume you are still riding well and the bike, as usual, is not the problem. However, being able to keep up with us younger sorts is a crucial part of the multifaceted event to which you refer. Just because you can ride, doesn't mean you can stay up and imbibe. But you NEED to.

Just like any part of cycling, you need to train for your specific weakness. Begin NOW! Go to the fridge and grab a beverage containing the said ingredient. Alcohol.

So, like anything, get your base beers in and be ready for the steady basal rate of drinking. Endurance has to be there otherwise you'll get "dropped".

Once you feel as though you have good base, you can begin drinking in zone 3, 4 and 5. I would suggest some short quick beer intervals, slam one once and a while, while maintaining your base imbibing rate. Or an alternative strategy may be to do intervals of beverages with more alcohol. This taxes the system and builds recovery.

You should be ready to hang at this point. As always, hydration is the key. Now, this is where it gets tricky, you don't want to let your pals know that you are getting water into your system as they may try to stop you from doing so. So, you may have to sneak off on occasion to get some H2O in.

If this plan doesn't work for you, then I would suggest a deception plan. Drinking a beer or two with the "youngsters" and then carry the SAME beer can with you all night, filling it with water as to appear infallible in the realm of long tour drinking. Yet as the "youngsters" become more "unobservant" (read Drunk) you will start gaining all sorts of points on the general classification.

I have received some of this information from a pal on our team known as the Swearing Scotsman (CyclingNews knows him as ROY). He knows his stuff.

Kelby Bethards, MD

PS: See you in Iowa. Your secret is safe with me, at least 40% of the time."